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10 Reasons why GTA IV Sucks

May 13th, 2008

#1. The trigger controls on the driving and brakes is terrible. I can only use the “classic” control set up. Yet, on that setting, every time you get a call you end up taking it and agreeing to whatever it is they want.

#2. The people annoy the hell out of me blowing up my celly all the gotdamn time. Do I really need to keep up with all these relationships? The darts and bowling are cool, but damn, I don’t wanna drive halfway across town just to keep somebody happy. I got other shit to do. If I wanted to do all that I woulda bought, The Sims.

#3. I don’t like that you can’t aim at what you want to shoot at. It only target locks, how do I shoot out a tire or shoot somebody in the head while they trying to drive away?

#4. Where’s the gym? Niko looks sloppy in a suit.

#5. This Brucie punk is annoying as hell. I wanna kill him and toss him in the river.

#6. The guy in the suit store gets a shotty to the dome every time I walk in there. He’s gonna try me every time I try something on. And the bouncers inside keeps cracking his knuckles and acting hard.

#7. It’s hard as hell to escape the police when you have 3 stars. The paint and spray used to be the stuff, but now you have to lose the cops first. What’s the point then?

#8. They made some of the cars so dope, I don’t want to mess ‘em up. I’m riding a 2-tone candy Range on 24’s and a clean ass Ferrari. They just sit in my parking spot cuz I know if I take one, I’ll lose it. The paint on the Range is too fresh, and I’m worried I won’t find another Ferrari. I already won a fast ass Porsche and lost that it cuz I had to leave it to drive some sorry ass car of Jacob’s to stash some dope. When I went back it was gone.

#9. The toll on the bridge sucks.

#10. Where’s the race horses? On San Andreas (or Vice City, I don’t remember), EARLY in the game, I won millions from betting on the horses and at the casino. I hate this slow money.

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